Detransition recently came up in kind of a weird way…
So I have a question…
Sure, what’s up?
Can you just undo it all, and go back to looking like a guy? I don’t even know if I’m asking that right or not.
No, I understand. What you’re asking, is if I could do what’s called detransition. The short answer is yes. But then why would I?
I’m just asking.
In order to detransition, I would have to go through a mastectomy, undergo hormone replacement therapy, and spend the rest of my life taking medications that may or may not ever help.
What Detransition Would Feel Like
Imagine if you will, depression. A person who suffers from depression finally finds a medication or treatment that allows them to cope and fight back. Now, after a few years, imagine not only taking that treatment from them, but replacing it with an anxiety inducing medication. The effect would resemble removing their will to live.
While certain political and social groups would remove the disorder stigma from Gender Dysphoria it remains a mental issue. The therapeutics used today positively affect those who actually suffer from the illness. Unfortunately, the same therapeutics have a strong negative effect on those who don’t have the actual illness. Fortunately enough, I belong to the former category.
In my case, I take minimal medications, and focus on psychological solutions like Cognitive Behavioral and Talk Therapy. However, the physical changes that did occur early on beat back the painful distress a lot.
But What About [insert value]
After making certain my explanation answered her question. She had one more to ask.
But what if the Church* says you have to?
*She’s talking about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
They won’t, the First Presidency has already taken a pretty strong stance on that. You can read it at churchofjesuschrist.org/topics/transgender.
So you think that it’s okay?
I’m still the spouse Crystal wants, the parent my children need, and I protect and provide for their every need. Do I think it’s okay? No, but I’m doing the best I can with my given challenges.
Thank you for answering my questions.
Encouraging Detransition Through Shared Values
I lost track of how many times someone’s tried to use my faith, my masculinity, my emotional ties, or my personal nature to convince me that being me is wrong. First off, I belong to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. While they have had a rocky history of figuring out these challenges, my leaders overwhelmingly show love as they learn more about me. Then, attacking my “masculinity” seems laughable at best. At worst, it’s what CS Lewis called a puritanical view of reality, or using faith as a crutch in the absence of other values. Next, trying to manipulate my feelings towards my family does little more than turn off my attention. My wife, Crystal, loves me unconditionally and I adore her. The two of us trust one another, and part of that stems from how open and honest we remain.
Probably the most hurtful comes from people who would use my care for them against me. But that’s a topic for another post.
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